Singaporeans from all walks of life were rejoicing today after Anton Casey inadvertently cured them all of xenophobia. This occurred after it was revealed that British readers of left liberal newspaper “The Guardian” hate the obnoxious expat too.
One office worker commented, “I know we’re supposed to help foreigners integrate, but really I just wanted to integrate my foot with his ass, if you know what I mean. At first I felt ashamed for harbouring such xenophobic thoughts, but apparently everyone in the world hates Anton Casey, so now it just seems normal and totally fine”.
The pale-faced expat is currently keeping a low profile, whereabouts unknown. But some Singaporeans sensed an opportunity. “At first I just wanted to throw eggs at his house, very xenophobic, I know.” admitted one cabby. “But after realising that thousands of Brits hate Casey too, I thought why not forge closer ties with the UK, ship our eggs over there and outsource the process? It may seem strange to integrate with foreigners who don’t actually live here, but at least they don’t hate us, right”.
Media commentators predict that hatred of Casey will continue to grow exponentially until either he apologises, or the next MRT breakdown, at which point everyone in Singapore will go back to bitching about the government instead.